WHICH IS BETTER FISH OR MARSHMALLOWS?
By
WHO ELSE BUT THE GREAT MELVIN ZWICK

Lydia and Kyle went fishing in Swofford Pond which is near the Bowes Ranch.
The picture reminds me of a song. “PUT YOUR SHOES ON LUCY DON’T YOU KNOW YOU ARE IN THE CITY.”

Now friends, I, MELVIN ZWICK, have seen Swofford Pond. Here in Arizona when we have a body of fresh water as big as Swofford Pond we call it a lake.

So I, MELVIN ZWICK, wanting to be correct in defining what a lake is looked up the word on Wikipedia. What a weird name, Wikipedia. Anyway Wikipedia, had the following to say about lakes.

A lake (from Latin lacus) is a terrain feature (or physical feature) that is a considerable inland body of water, not part of the ocean, that is larger and deeper than a pond, and may or may not be moving slowly, and is localized to the bottom of basin (another type of landform or terrain feature) and is fed by a river.[1][2]
Natural lakes are generally found in mountainous areas, rift zones, and areas with ongoing or recent glaciation. Other lakes are found in endorheic basins or along the courses of mature rivers. In some parts of the world, there are many lakes because of chaotic drainage patterns left over from the last Ice Age. All lakes are temporary over geologic time scales, as they will slowly fill in with sediments or spill out of the basin containing them.
There is considerable uncertainty about defining the difference between lakes and ponds. For example, limnologists have defined lakes as waterbodies which are simply a larger version of a pond, or which have wave action on the shoreline, or where wind induced turbulence plays a major role in mixing the water column. None of these definitions completely excludes ponds and all are difficult to measure. For this reason there has been increasing use made of simple size-based definitions to separate ponds and lakes. In the United Kingdom, for example, the charity Pond Conservation - which works to protect all types of freshwater ecosystem - has defined lakes as waterbodies of 2 hectares (5 acres) or more in area [3]. Elsewhere, other workers have treated lakes as waterbodies of 5 hectares (12 acres) and above, or 8 hectares (20 acres) and above (see definitions of pond). Charles Elton, one of the founders of ecology, regarded lakes as waterbodies of 40 hectares (99 acres) or more, a value somewhat larger than modern studies would suggest appropriate [4]. The term "lake" is also used to describe a feature such as Lake Eyre, which is a dry basin most of the time but may become filled under seasonal conditions of heavy rainfall.

How is that for a bunch of gobbly gook?

After all that I, MELVIN ZWICK, still think that Swofford Pond in Arizona would be called Swofford Lake.

This is LAKE BILLY CHINOOK in Deschutes National Forest, Oregon. Its not bigger that Swooford pond and it is still a lake. Maybe in Oregon small bodies of water are lakes and in Washington they are ponds.
Anyway with a name like LAKE BILLY CHINOOK it would have to be a lake and not a pond. In fact with a name like LAKE BILLY CHINOOK it should be an ocean.

And so we have discussed ponds vs. lakes which leads us to marshmallows.

How did we get to marshmallows from ponds and lakes you ask. Come on I know you are wondering. Lakes to marshmallows? How did that happen?

Well family it is quite simple for me, MELVIN ZWICK, to get to marshmallows from lakes. First the subject of this paper is ponds and lakes and what do they have in common? Water right. And what letter does water start with? “W” correct. And what does a “W” have to do with marshmallows?
You must remember that in my, MELVIN ZWICK’S weird and upside down world the letter “W” could lead to Marshmallows.

I could make it a puzzle for all of you to solve but this time I, MELVIN ZWICK, will divulge how I, MELVIN ZWICK, got to marshmallows from ponds and lakes.

Water is common to both ponds and lakes and water starts with “W” which in my, MELVIN ZWICK, upside world is an upside down “M” which is what the word marshmallows starts with. Simple right?
Not only that but Chocolate Loving Momma sent pictures of Mr. Joseph sneaking into the pantry and getting a before smores package. I, MELVIN ZWICK could not let those pictures get by without a few comments by me, MELVIN ZWICK.

The following is in Joseph own thoughts. I, MELVIN ZWICK, used my psychic ability to read his mind from the photos Chocolate Loving Momma put into her blog.

“Ha Ha Chocolate Loving Momma is helping Valerie use some things that are sharp but I don’t know the word for them yet. They are working on some cloth. Something about a future dress.
I will just sneak into the pantry and see what I can find. If I am real sneaky no one will know I, JOESPH, am in the pantry.
Oh boy a bag of some white squishy things that look like they might be something good to eat. I, JOSEPH, remember that my brothers and sisters use these things on a stick over a fire and make them all black then eat them. I, JOSEPH, wonder what they taste like.”
I, JOSEPH, could open the bag and eat some. If I, JOSEPH, Dood It I might get into trouble. I, JOSEPH, will dood it anyway.

“Lets see. How do they taste? Uhmmmmm they taste good. I, JOSEPH, bet they taste a lot better than those black things my brothers and sisters eat.”




“These things are really squishy. I, JOSEPH, wonder how many I can put into my mouth at a time before Chocolate Loving Momma catches me? Lets see I have four in my mouth now and am about to cram in another one.”




“Oh oh!!!!!!!!!!! Caught in the act. Maybe I, JOSEPH, can convince Chocolate Loving Momma that the monkeys on my pajamas made me dood it.”
“While I, JOSEPH, explain it maybe Chocolate Loving Momma may not notice that I am about to eat another one.”
“ I love my Momma. All she did was take pictures of me, Joseph eating those squishy things.”

THE END FOR NOW