ZWICK PLANTS A FLOWER CHAPTER III

ZWICK PLANTS A FLOWER
BY MELVIN ZWICK

CHAPTER III

I, MELVIN ZWICK, woke this morning and went outside to check on the flowers I planted. Look what I found. A note tacked to the tree. Who put it there and what did it day?









Oh no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! look at me with ivy growing out of my ears. What am I, MELVIN ZWICK, to do? I trim the ivory and it grows back immediately. What am I, MELVIN ZWICK, to do? I may have to stay indoors until the ivy is gone. Oh poor me, MELVIN ZWICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MELVIN ZWICK PLANTS A FLOWER II

MELVIN ZWICK PLANTS A FLOWER
BY
MELVIN ZWICK THE STORY TELLER

CHAPTER II

I, MELVIN ZWICK, decided to plant another flower. This time I will be very careful not to be caught by the Underground Human Grabber monster.



This time I, MELVIN ZWICK THE GREAT HUNTER, is prepared for the Underground Human Grabber monster. The 409 cleaner kills ants so I, MELVIN ZWICK, think it might kill the monster just like it kills ants. Ants and the Underground Human Grabber monster are alike because they both live underground.





As I, MELVIN ZWICK, did when I planted the last plant I grab loose soil from the hole and place it on the pallet. The Underground Human Grabber monster grabbed me while I was doing this the last time I dug the hole. I am very careful to prevent being captured this time.



Look what I, MELVIN ZWICK, found while digging the hole. Pieces of old Indian pottery. Pieces like this are called pottery shards. There must have been a Melvin in the old times.



Oh no!!!!!!!!!!!! The Underground Human Grabber monster almost got me but I was too fast this time. I pulled out my hand from the hole and sprayed the Underground Human Grabber monster with the 409. It retreated into the hole.



The 409 must not have worked as Underground Human Grabber monster popped its head up again, but a knock from the baseball bat sent it back into the hole. I, MELVIN ZWICK, finished digging the hole without any more problems.

I, MELVIN ZWICK, noticed my stomach was telling me that it was lunch time. The critters in the hole seemed to be settled in so I, MELVIN ZWICK, got up and went inside and fixed my lunch.




When I came back out I, MELVIN ZWICK, holding my big drink mug was amazed with what I saw at the hole.



If you look closely at the above picture you will see three Underground Human Grabber monsters. They are just waiting to grab me, MELVIN ZWICK.




I, MELVIN ZWICK, grabbed the baseball bat and started whacking the Underground Human Grabber monsters.



I, MELVIN ZWICK, whacked this guy like a golf ball. He immediately hustled back into the hole I just dug.



Kyle, Grandpa’s home run slugging Grandson, would be proud of me, MELVIN ZWICK, as I slammed this Underground Human Grabber monster for a home run.



Little Indy, Kyle’s month old small little guy who judges at the fair placed in last place because he had a small carcass, sure did a great job of retrieving the Underground Human Grabber monster I, MELVIN ZWICK the home run slugger, hit into left field. Who needs a retrieving dog around when you have a retrieving Indy?
By the way, having a small carcass means the sheep is too small to eat. Seems to me, MELVIN ZWICK, that if I was a edible farm animal I would try keep myself too small to eat but big enough to look like I might be big enough in the future.




I showed Grandpa how I, MELVIN ZWICK, planted his plant.



Here is what the plant looked like as I, MELVIN ZWICK, gave it a MELVIN ZWICK, spell.

THE END

ZWICK PLANTS A FLOWER
BY
WHO ELSE BUT THE GREAT MELVIN ZWICK
WITH A FEW COMMENTS FROM GRANDPA

It was a pleasant day on May 2, 2009 when I, MELVIN ZWICK the great horticulturist, decided to plant a flower in Grandpa’s front yard. Actually the flower was to be planted in the gravel portion of Grandpa’s front yard. Grandma and Grandpa were at that marvelous store Costco where you go with a list of five items and come home with twenty five items. Grandma likes to go as soon as the story opens to get away from the crowd. Grandpa likes to go later so that all the free food dispensers are supplying food. A person can get enough free food to make a full lunch. I, MELVIN ZWICK, thought I would plant a new plant in their garden to surprise them when they got back. Digging in the soil is very difficult as there are many rocks in the way. I, MELVIN ZWICK, like to work as easily as possible so I wheel out my garden cart so that I have something to sit on while I did the hole.


When I, MELVIN ZWICK the great digger, had been digging for a while the Underground Human Grabber grabbed my hand and started to pull me into the hole. The grabber was very strong.


It was a real tug of war as the Grabber pulling me down and I pulled back up.


The mean nasty Underground Human Grabber was getting the best of me, MELVIN ZWICK, even though I am the strongest man in the world.


The Underground Human Grabber won the tug of war. I, MELVIN ZWICK, was headed into the home of the Underground Human Grabber.


Grandpa who had just returned from Costco heard me hollering and tried to pull me, MELVIN ZWICK, out but he had no success. I, MELVIN ZWICK, was on my way to the home of the Underground Human Grabber.


Grandpa looked into the hole but could not see me. He did hear a tremendous fight going on. Once I, MELVIN ZWICK, entered the home of the Underground Human Grabber I told it (note I, MELVIN ZWICK, called it it as it was not human) I was going to go back up stairs. It said no way. You are my guest and must stay here. I, MELVIN ZWICK the master of Karate, gave that Underground Human Grabber a good working over. It decided if it wanted to live a longer life it better
let me go.


Grandpa was amazed to see me, MELVIN ZWICK, reaching out of the hole. As you can see I, MELVIN ZWICK, looks a little dirty.


Grandpa thinks it is a little funny to see me, MELVIN ZWICK the great adventurer, in the hole.



I, MELVIN ZWICK the great photographer, took this photo of the Underground Human Grabber just before we got into a fight. It was one seven foot mean looking dude. After the great adventure I, MELVIN ZWICK, decided I no longer wanted to plant the flower. Grandpa took over. I, MELVIN ZWICK the clean person, did not want to have anything more to do with the Underground Human Grabber. Not only was the adventure with the Underground Human Grabber enough to keep me away from the planting I, MELVIN ZWICK, knew the next step in planting the flower was to put some smell stuff in the hole to mix with the dirt. So it was Grandpa “Do your stuff.”

I, MELVIN ZWICK, am going tell you a Grandpa Planting Secret. After Grandpa puts in the smelly stuff into the hole he mixes it with some dirt in the hole.


Then he pours some water mixed with some vitamin B1. The mixture encourages plant roots to grow. He then mixed the water, dirt and smelly stuff until it turns into mud.


Once the stuff is mixed well Grandpa puts the plant on the mud in the hole.


Then its more smelly stuff. Grandpa mixed the smelly stuff in with some dirt.


Grandpa then puts the mixture into the hole around the plant.


Grandpa packs the mixture to remove all air pockets. Roots do not like air.


Then it more water and B1.


There it is. A small bougainvillea about to jump into your face.


I, MELVIN ZWICK, said a few magic words and poof look what happened to the plant.

Melvin Zwick, you have proven again that your imagination is almost a big as your ego. I, GRANDPA, am amazed how you took the photographs. All our family knows that only you or grandpa can exist at one time. For you to be in the picture you had to set the camera on a tripod, set the timer for 10 seconds, press the shutter release button then run to the scene and pose all within the 10 seconds before the shutter trips. For me, Grandpa, to be in the picture I had to do the same thing.

Oh by the way I, GRANDPA, dug the hole.

Now a challenge to Grandpas detectives. Keep in mind that Melvin Zwick only had 10 seconds to set up the photograph. I doubt there was enough time to run back to the scene, take off the shoes and place them in the hole before the shutter clicked. Did Melvin Zwick place the shoes in the hole walk back to the camera in bare feet on the gravel then run back to the scene in bear feet?

Grandpa I, MELVIN ZWICK, have soles on my feet that are as tough as leather. Walking on gravel is not problem for me, MELVIN ZWICK.

I don’t think so. You could not walk on grave in you bare feet. You had another trick. OK detectives how did Melvin Zwick do it. Get from the camera to the scene.

THE END